The price of rebirth

Chapter 24 A Stubborn Thought

To many people, including Su Yan, those three words are extremely strange and distant, even more unrealistic than Two-dimensional cartoons.As far as they are concerned, it is fine if they have heard it, but what do those three words have anything to do with them?They still have to go to school, do papers, struggle for the college entrance examination, and look forward to their dreams.

Even standing in the corridor after class, I saw boys hugging and frolicking, cheek to cheek childishly squeezed, and some people even explored each other's lower body.Hugging together and calling you my daughter-in-law, there are too many screams of daughter-in-law and daughter-in-law, no one will think wrong.

That's all just a game.

Su Yan used to think so.

Why do men fall in love with men?Maybe now he has found the answer.

There is no essential difference between men loving men and men loving women and women loving men.

A girl likes a boy, perhaps because of a song, a word, a princely face, a smile, a period of time, day and night, and love for a long time.

Thousands of kinds of "like you", "that person" in my mind in various poses and with different expressions.

A's arsenic and B's honey, A's honey and B's arsenic.

Why do you like it, just because there is such a person in everyone's heart, he once touched you even for a second, made your heart beat, remember, and you can never pretend that it never happened again.

When that touch gets deeper and deeper, he will occupy your heart.

No matter what others say, it cannot change the fact.

As soon as the news of Chen Wanwan and Liang Kui's breakup spread, the puppies who were eager to make a move in the second class of the first year quietly retreated, but there were also one or two couples who secretly engaged in it.

Su Yan, who is at the same table, knows that the number of love letters Liang Kui receives is increasing, and they are all girls from other classes and grades.

There were also a few girls in the class who liked Liang Kui and boldly approached Liang Kui. Chen Wanwan was already in the past tense, and they were still afraid of a ball.

I don't know what's wrong with Liang Kui, but no one accepts it, and follows Su Yan's example of living a happy single life.

In this short period of time, SARS has become more and more serious, making people panic and restless. The most news I hear when I go to school every day is how many people died in a certain place, and many students said enviously: We It would be great if there was a SARS patient in the school, so that classes could be suspended.

"Jie Jie Jie, Yanyan, don't be afraid, with your body SARS won't find you."

Su Yan stepped on the bicycle quickly, wearing earplugs in both ears, and galloped on the way home. He seldom listened to music channels recently, and listened to all the news.The word SARS is almost ear-numbing.

"I'm not afraid." Su Yan said in a deep voice.

"Jie Jie, why do you listen to it every day?"

"Understanding current events, SARS did not affect us here, but there are few people going out recently. The shopping malls, pedestrian streets, and vegetable markets are pretty deserted everywhere, and they all go out with mask faces. Even if they are not afraid in their hearts, they are surrounded by mask faces. Suddenly it was like being in a hospital ward, surrounded by 'sickness'."

Su Yan adjusted his glasses while talking, he is even more unwilling to take off his glasses now.

"Jie Jie, to put it bluntly, you are still afraid."

"perhaps."

"It's strange that there is still a plague in such a developed world."

Su Yan laughed: "What is development? Human beings are progressing, and diseases are also 'progressing'. In every era, there are always some diseases called terminal illnesses, and there is a new type of vocabulary called 'virus'. Now SARS, and there will be bird flu in the future. , waste oil, clenbuterol, melamine, and plasticizers, I don’t know what to eat is clean.”

"Jie Jie Jie Jie, what you eat is clean."

"Yeah, thanks to you for giving me a second life."

"Yanyan talks a lot today"

Su Yan's movement of riding a bicycle paused, and then continued to move forward as if nothing had happened: "My birthday is coming soon."

April 26 morning.

Liang Kui got his own packages in the reception room, there were seven or eight packages, large and small.

Liang Kui returned to the classroom with a bundle in his arms, and greeted the exclamation and curiosity of all the students with a happy face.

"Wow, Liang Kui, what are you hugging?"

"It's all gifts?"

"many!"

"What day is it?"

Liang Kui was very popular, and was immediately surrounded by a group of classmates who helped Liang Kui unpack the package.

Dead man envious of limited edition basketball shoes, game consoles, clothes, leather wallets, luxury chocolates, handmade decorations, watches...

"Today is my birthday."

Liang Kui giggled cheerfully, deeply feeling the love of his family and friends.Although he can't go home and his family can't come to visit him for his birthday, his heart has been conveyed.

Apart from these, what Liang Kui is most satisfied with is the money that his grandparents put into his card.

"Happy birthday! Liang Kui!" All the students congratulated loudly.

Liang Kui was in a good mood and immediately invited the whole class to have dinner on Saturday afternoon. Although today was his birthday, he couldn't go out today.

After one class, Liang Kui personally went to tell each student the specific time. Even Chen Yan was invited, and the only one who was not invited was Chen Wanwan.

Both of them broke up, and of course it's best to draw a line between them.Why are you still friends after breaking up? It's a fool.

"Su Yan, don't go, we are also at the same table, you have to give me face." Liang Kui felt that anyone would appreciate face, maybe it was Su Yan.

Su Yan rubbed his sore neck and nodded: "Go, eat seafood, right? If you don't go, you won't go."

"Oh, how do you know how to eat seafood? Hehe, I really have a good understanding. I plan to take everyone to Zhongshan Road to eat seafood. By the way, I have to call two cars. Our school is quite far from Zhongshan Road. Fortunately, there is no late self-study on Saturday. .”

On Saturday, the second class of the first year and a few students from other classes boarded the bus invited by Liang Kui. The boys from the other class were all friends Liang Kui knew from playing basketball.Two cars of people drove across half of the city to the Seafood Restaurant.

Many people have never eaten seafood at all, and they go in with novelty and anticipation.Who knows how many people are allergic after eating, this one feels uncomfortable, that one feels like vomiting.A good birthday dinner leaves regrets.

Su Yan knew the result of the birthday party, but he didn't stop it.

Liang Kui was very happy on this day, and most of the classmates were also happy. Everyone had a good time playing and eating, and the May Day holiday started on Monday!Who doesn't look forward to the seven-day holiday.

Fortunately, everyone had a good time, but they all restrained their desire to drink and replaced them with beverages and tea. Several girls bought an oversized cake for Liang Kui. When the happy birthday song sounded, Liang Kui Smile bright like the sun.

This belongs to Liang Kui, his 16th birthday.

Maybe there is something really called fate.

April 26 is Liang Kui's birthday.Except for Su Yan's parents, no one knew that this day was also Su Yan's birthday.Su Yan's ID card is Winter's birthday, but that was a mistake when registering.The real birthday is in April, not the end of the year.

Every year before, his parents celebrated his birthday on April 26.

It was [-]:[-] p.m. when everyone came out after eating seafood. They took the bus back to school. Many students got off the bus along the way, but some of them vomited and had allergies. Liang Kui hurriedly pulled them into a taxi and sent them to the hospital.

Su Yan poked his temple and fell into the memory over and over again, as real as a dream, as if born in the cracks, to the left, is the reborn Su Yan, to the right, is the past Su Yan.

Watching Lin Qiang and Liang Kui take the patients to the hospital, Su Yan sent the other students back to school.

It is so now, and it was more or less so before.

Su Yan sent the last classmate away, went back to the classroom, packed his schoolbag, walked to the carport, and rode his bicycle to leave the night campus.

Eat seafood, Liang Kui's birthday.

At night, the street is bustling and deserted for a while, Su Yan is getting closer and closer to home, getting closer...

That scene, like a dream, always appeared in Su Yan's mind when he was in college.

The bicycle turned a few small bends, and not far away was the community where he lived.Bicycles jingling and gliding through the dark alleys, the world in the corner of the eye is another kind of lens, which is incompatible with the quiet night, darker than the night, and more smelly than the garbage pile on the roadside.

The bicycle stopped suddenly, and Su Yan closed his eyes, as if hesitating, hesitating, afraid, and encouraging himself.

Why do you feel the same way when you live your life again?

Su Yan shook his head, his mood was always different.

That time, he rode by here and then froze at the entrance of the alley.Hesitant, afraid, wanting to help, but also afraid of being implicated.But in the end he stopped his bicycle, picked up a trash can by the side of the road and threw it at it.Not because he worried about Liang Kui so much, not because he was so righteous.At that time, he and Liang Kui had only a handful of conversations, and the relationship between the two was just 'acquaintance'. Like most people, he attended Liang Kui's birthday party and ate a meal of expensive seafood.He didn't know Liang Kui well, but he rushed up, more because of psychological restlessness.There was too much unhappiness in the backlog, and when he witnessed the bloody violence, he was impulsive and ignited.

When he smashed the trash can recklessly and stood beside Liang Kui, from that moment on, he reached a turning point in his life.An abnormal road, full of bitterness and no results, but recalling it, there is a lot of happiness, such a road.

Now, he is not Su Yan from before.

He has a cell phone, he can call the police.He still has common sense. When encountering such a powerless thing, even if he can't call the police, he can still call the nearby adults.

If he rushed in alone, he would only be beaten with Liang Kui.

Call the police, the police will come to solve it.

Call someone, let's solve it together.

He can also choose to just be a passerby.

"Jie Jie, Yanyan is hesitant, Yanyan, think about your original obsession and the reason for rebirth, why do you want to be reborn?"

Why rebirth.

He died, full of resentment.

I don't understand why I want to die, I don't understand who wants him to die, I don't understand too much.

Even if he was depressed, withdrawn, gloomy, or depraved, when he graduated from college, like all college students, he devoted himself to the enthusiasm of finding a job, so as to have a good prospect for his future.

He submitted his resume time and time again, practiced, found a satisfactory job, and became an office worker seriously.He wants to buy a car and change to a bigger house.With such a fulfilling life, he is no longer the Su Yan he used to be.He is appreciated by his boss, has a new circle and friends, and everything is fine.

It was just a company holiday that day, and he went back to school to get his files.

But he never saw the sun again the next day.

In the abandoned factory, he was beaten and kicked by several strangers, strangers, all strangers.

When the knife stabbed into his body, he realized in shock that this was not a lesson or kidnapping, but murder.

With the last of his strength, he questioned over and over again why he wanted to kill him.

There is no answer, those people are not gangsters on the street at all, gangsters don't have such calm eyes, and gangsters' killing hands are not so steady.

They didn't even say a word.

But Su Yan, who was unwilling to die, firmly remembered a few faces.

He thought, no matter how many lives he was reborn in, he would never forget it.

Some people say that before death, people like to remember, and life is like rewinding bit by bit, returning to thoughts bit by bit. Many, many memories of the past that have been kept in mind and thrown in the corner come in full force.

He thought that he had an ordinary and happy family when he was a child, and his parents loved him.

He looks forward to growing up soon, and his relatives and friends like to say, Yanyan, Xiaoyan, you really look like your father, and you will be a handsome guy when you grow up.

When parents fight, when he becomes a liability, when they leave him.

He has indeed grown up, a 15-year-old boy, but the price of growing up is too high.

He thought of many people, flashing past one by one like a revolving lantern at the dying moment.

Those people are alive, but he is going to die.

After he died, he really walked out of other people's world.

Why did he die, he wanted to live, he wanted to live, he wanted to live!

Many people owe him an answer, and he wants to live and live an answer.

Instead of being confused and dying with regret.

"You take the same path, and when you get to the exit, you may not meet the same person. Being reborn does not mean coming back. With your rebirth, everything will no longer be the same. When you go further and further away, what you need The answer will never be found. Even I will get lost in the new intersection. You are Su Yan, the reborn Su Yan, not the Su Yan who was looking for the answer and died innocently full of resentment."

"If I forget that Su Yan, what's the point of my rebirth. If there is no Su Yan, I will not be reborn at all. No matter which Su Yan is, it is me, my memories, my past, my future, all belong to I."

"Then you have to follow that track and don't go astray."

Su Yan took a deep breath and walked towards the trash can.

Yes, he was born again.He also has room to help.

He can skip high school, leave the city, and go out to do business directly.You can make a lot of money and throw it in your parents' faces as a thank you for their upbringing.You don't have to care about homosexuality or not, you can marry a wife and have children, or you don't need to know those people at all.

He can be Su Yan, a Su Yan who has nothing to do with the dead Su Yan.

but……

Su Yan slammed the trash can on Hongmao's back, and Hongmao, who stepped on Liang Kui, rolled to the ground with a scream.Su Yan quickly pulled Liang Kui up and blocked him behind him.There was no time to say a word, several yellow-haired people rushed towards Su Yan angrily: "Where did you come from, the little mouse is dead! How dare you meddle in your own business!"

The yellow-haired men punched and kicked to greet Su Yan, Su Yan resisted and backed away, but there were too many of them, besides those who did the fighting, there were also those standing guard watching, such as the leader Shen Cheng with a cigarette in his mouth!

In the past, he didn't know Shen Cheng at all, and he didn't understand why Shen Cheng besieged Liang Kui. Liang Kui didn't tell him until he woke up in the hospital.

Now he knows Shen Cheng, and Shen Cheng also knows him. Shen Cheng looked at Su Yan in a little surprise, and frowned, "Oh, I think about who you are... Su... What's the matter with Su? You are the squad leader, right! This me Remember, what's the matter, the class leader is also responsible for stabbing students in both sides? The class leader has to show brotherhood? Please, you are the one who counts, hit! Hit me together! You don't have to die, you can say hello! Mother's leg , what do one or two think of me, Shen Cheng?"

No matter how hard Su Yan tried to resist, the opponent was so numerous that a kitten could not defeat a group of vicious dogs.And Liang Kui had lost his combat effectiveness long before Su Yan came out, and lay unconscious on the ground.These people are really ruthless, they don't beat people to death so hard, they can be maimed and beaten into vegetative state.

"You...are you not afraid of going to jail..." Su Yan said with difficulty.

Shen Cheng was taken aback for a moment, then laughed loudly: "Hahaha, I'm dying of laughter, you're a fool when you study! You're still in jail! Who put me in jail? These days, I don't have the money to settle the injustice, and besides, I'm underage, so I'm afraid of getting hurt. Ah, at most I can go in and have two meals in prison, I am not afraid, even if I am in prison, I still have to vent my anger. Bastard, dare to mess with me! Dare to pick on my wife, and even break up with me, and I will yell at you!" Shen Cheng kicked angrily. Liang Kui, Liang Kui's blood was soft and terrifying, Su Yan tried hard to see Liang Kui's situation clearly, and secretly screamed in his heart.

I don't know if it was because of him, but Liang Kui was never injured so badly before, and he came out after staying in the hospital for half a month.However, in this situation, it is difficult to say for a month!Even watching, it is possible to sleep forever like this, and never wake up again.

Su Yan frowned, and rushed towards Shen Cheng with all his might, punched Shen Cheng in the face with his fists, and pressed his knee against Shen Cheng's stomach. It was all ripped off and it hurt so badly.Someone hugged Su Yan's head with frightening strength, dragged Su Yan to rush, and then slammed into the wall.

Su Yan buzzed, his whole brain became hot and confused, and his mind was blurred. Su Yan turned his head stiffly and looked towards the exit of the alley, where it could lead to the light.

The expected siren sound came from far away, Su Yan heaved a sigh of relief and let himself fall into a coma.